So Your Tennis Partner Missed The Poach

How do you feel when your doubles partner misses a poach? Angry? Confused? Exasperated?

And do you communicate these feelings to your partner?

Yikes.

Poaching in doubles is no easy proposition. Even the best players can misjudge a poach and end up blowing the point by mishitting the ball. Or, worse yet, lose the point by being burned by an opponent's down the line shot.

But nothing is worse than going for the poach, missing it and then being berated by your partner for even trying. I myself have blown a poach and had my partner tell me, "I could have had that" or "You don't need to go for those." I've also been the recipient of the exasperated eye roll which I interpret to mean: "I would appreciate it if you would just stand at the net and let me try to win this point in a prolonged ground stroke rally."

The reality is that when a poach works, its a truly beautiful thing and very often will end the point in your favor. And when it doesn't work, it can still be pretty effective in rattling your opponents.

Now, if your partner misses five or six poaches in quick succession, then sure, it might be time to advise her to back off. Otherwise, encourage her to keep it up.

Bottom line - support your poaching partner, even when she misses the poach.  It might just be the attacking style of tennis you need to win your match.




© Kim Selzman 2012 All Rights Reserved

Retro Tennis Fixation: "I HATE My Partner!"

I recently played a HORRIBLE doubles match - my partner and I got creamed. Our opponents were very, very good players. But the real problem for me was my partner. Or at least that was the way I saw it and once I saw it that way, I couldn't let go. I tried to tell myself that getting mad at my partner wasn't helping anything but, after the match, I actually went to my captain to complain. Me! The queen of "support your partner" and "be a team player."

Anyway, I knew I had addressed this problem here sometime in the past so I dug up this "Retro Tennis Fixation" post, from August 2009, called I HATE My Partner! to try and remind myself what to do next time this happens.


First off, I don't HATE any of my partners. There are many, many of them and they are all lovely people with whom I enjoy playing tennis. I wouldn't play if I wasn't having fun, right?

And you probably don't hate your tennis partner either. But, sometimes, on occasion, maybe every once in awhile, you end up with a partner you're not completely compatible with. I call this the "mismatched partner."

Maybe your mismatched partner is someone new you've never played with before. Or never even met before! Maybe your mismatched partner is someone you've been invited to play with for fun. Or maybe your mismatched partner is someone you were assigned to play with by your team captain for a league match. However it happens, we’re all familiar with how difficult it can be to have to play with one of these mismatched partners.

Here are a few tips to make sure you not only get along with your mismatched partner, but that you enjoy playing and maybe win your match!

1. Control your emotions. The worst thing you can do when you're unhappy with your partner is let her know it. It won't help her play any better and it probably won't make you feel any better. So get a grip on yourself and decide that, between the two of you, YOU are going to be the strong and positive leader.
2. Be positive. It doesn't help anyone if you're negative. It makes you feel bad and it makes your partner feel even worse. If you have some helpful criticism, give it in an upbeat way. For example, if your partner won't come up to the net, telling her "I think we can really hurt them if we're both up at the net" is a lot more productive than "Why can't you just get up to the net??!!"
3. Help your partner focus on tennis. Its hard to play with someone who isn't concentrating on your match. Instead of letting them ramble on about the chances of their son getting into a really good college, help them concentrate on your match by talking about what's happening on the court. Just letting them know what you're thinking about and planning, i.e., "I'm trying to serve up the middle to set you up for the poach", may be enough to get them focused on tennis.
4. Communicate. Talking throughout the match can only help. Let your partner know what you're thinking. And if you're worried that this will bother your partner (maybe they'll think you're being hypercritical or don't know what you're talking about or are just talking too much) do what I do and claim you're mostly talking to yourself. Here's my standard disclaimer: "Don't let all of my talking get to you. I'm mostly talking to myself anyway."
5. Don't throw in the towel. Giving up is the best way to lose your match. And once you've let your partner know you've given up, she will probably give up too. So don't quit because you never know what might happen. The match you think you may lose can turn out to be the incredible comeback story you're telling your tennis pals about later!
6. Work on your own game. When all else fails, when you've finally decided the match is unwinnable because you just can't play well with this person, think about playing well for yourself. Play your game and find something you can work on - be more aggressive, hit your spin second serve, poach more, come in more, lob more. Use the match as an opportunity to improve your own game so you can walk away feeling good about tennis.

The mismatched partner - you have a hard time playing with them, but you can't back out. And you shouldn't! Because, I think this is a common tennis saying - tennis with a mismatched partner is always better than no tennis at all.

If you want to make sure YOU'RE not the mismatched partner, click on the following post and get my tips on How To Be A Great Tennis Partner!


© Kim Selzman 2011 All Rights Reserved

Mental Coaching For Tennis - Yes, I'm Doing It!

I am going to admit something to you that I believe will convince you what a nut I am about tennis. Here goes:

I am working with a mental sports coach to improve my tennis game.

That's right. Me. The person who is not a serious athlete. Me. The player who is more concerned with how cute her skirt looks than with how deep her volley goes. Me. The person who does not believe in "affirmations" or "visualizations" or taking deep breathes on a regular basis. Yes, I am getting mental coaching from someone who helps professional athletes gain the psychological edge they need to not only improve in their sport, but to excel. Even I can't believe it. And here's the weirdest part - I think it's working!

So how did this happen?

Well, I am a member of Team 4all, a group of women athlete bloggers put together by fitness apparel company 4all by jofit. The big golfer in the group is Kirsten Lewis who blogs about her experience at Kirsten's Awesome Quest. Since I have somewhat promised that I will get on this golf thing to please my husband, I have kept up with Kirsten and her blog and - guess what? - golfers are just as obsessive about their game as tennis players.

The other thing Kirsten does is provide mental coaching to athletes. She has a web site dedicated to this - Accessing The Awesomeness of You. And, lucky for me, she recently put together a group of several athletes to show just what mental coaching can do for athletes from all sports and at all levels of proficiency. When she approached me about working with her because she wanted to include a tennis player, I said yes, thinking I was just being nice to my fellow Team 4all member but honestly, I probably wouldn't get much out of it.

Of course, I was wrong.

Why? Because tennis is such a mental game! You know that and I know that (I just checked - I have 29 posts tagged "psychology"). So naturally, anything I can do to strengthen the mental aspect of my play is bound to help my game as a whole.

Here is what my mental coaching experience has been like so far: I have had two phone conversations with Kirsten. Each lasted about an hour. And I can honestly say, after each one, I really had a new view of what is possible for me as a tennis player. Kirsten was able to draw out from me what I see as my current limitations in my game - things I hadn't articulated for myself but knew were true as soon as I said them to her.

She gave me several affirmative questions to think about. Not to answer. Just to think about. One of them is: "What have I decided is not possible that truly is possible? And what is possible after that?" Sounds hokey, right? But by thinking on this (and a few other questions) for a week, I was able to come up with some new goals for myself that I would never have previously even considered (singles anyone?).

Without boring you with my personal details, I can tell you that, in just the few hours I have spent being "coached" by Kirsten, I have come to appreciate how sports psychology and mental coaching can help any athlete of any skill level. And I have another session coming in about a week and I am actually looking forward to it!

Are you ready for a mental coach? Well, maybe you're not quite ready to go out and hire someone to help you with this aspect of your tennis game. But don't pass up this opportunity for quick improvement. Check out these resources that I've used for some quick, easy, no-cost mental help:

• Accessing the Awesomeness of You: Extraordinary Results in Athletics and Life - Found at www.awesomenessofyou.com, this is Kirsten's mental coaching site. She also has a blog here and you can sign up to get her free newsletter.
• Sports Psychology For Tennis- Found at www.sportspsychologytennis.com, this web site is run by sports psychologist Dr. Patrick Cohn and is focused on mental coaching for tennis players. He also has a fabulous podcast called "Tennis Psychology Podcast" that you can download from iTunes or from his web site.

© Kim Selzman 2011 All Rights Reserved

Get Your Tennis Fix With Podcasts

If, like me, you're looking for anything and everything that might improve your tennis game, you need to check out the wonderful world of tennis podcasts.

As you probably know, podcasts are digital media files, audio or video, that you can download to your computer, iPod or MP3 player to listen to or watch at your leisure.

And there are plenty of podcasts that focus on tennis.  I get my tennis podcasts on iTunes but you can do a Google search to find all kinds of podcasts outside the iTunes world.

What I love about podcasts are that I can listen to them on the go, in my car or when I'm working out.  And I often listen to tennis podcasts on my way to matches just to get myself in the right frame of mind.  You know - the "I'm about to start playing tennis so I need to forget about what to make for dinner for a little while" frame of mind.

So here's a list of my favorites.  These are specifically podcasts aimed at improving your game - if you want to listen to podcasts about what the pros are doing, there are plenty of those too.  But these give you tips that will help take your game to the next level.  And - bonus! - they're all free on iTunes and can easily be found by doing a search for the podcast name or just for "tennis podcasts."  I've linked to each of these and if you click on the podcast name, you will be taken to the podcaster's site and can actually start listening right now!     

Essential Tennis Podcast - These episodes are usually 30 to 40 minutes long and often feature interviews with tennis instructors, psychologists or other professionals.  If you go to the Essential Tennis Podcast site you'll find the entire Essential Tennis website which is packed with all kinds of great instructional material for recreational players.  I love this website!

Gotta Play Tennis - These are a little bit shorter episodes, maybe 10 to 15 minutes, focusing on tips and concepts that will quickly improve your game.

Tennis Psychology Podcast - These episodes are even shorter but are great for helping build your mental strength out on the court.  If you're interested in going into more depth about tennis psychology, check out the website associated with this podcast:  Sports Psychology for Tennis.




© Kim Selzman 2010 All Rights Reserved

Adjust Your Attitude To Win In Tennis

We all know that, as much as it is a physical game, tennis is really a mental game.  And if you are not in the best mental place possible during a match, most likely you are going down.  So when everything's going wrong on the court, how go you get positive?  Oh, and since it's the middle of a match, how go you get positive fast?  Here are 3 easy steps to follow that will get your head back in the game:

1.  Be aware.  The biggest part of gaining a positive attitude on the court is recognizing when you have a negative attitude.  You know that negativity is not going to win you any points.  So you need to be aware of what's going on in your head and, if it sounds anything like this - "What is wrong with me?"  "I'm terrible!"  "My partner must hate me!"  "Why did I ever think I could play tennis?" "We're so going to lose this match!" - you need to be aware you're having those thoughts and realize they're not only not helping.  They're actually hurting. 

2.  Forget about winning and losing.  Play one point at a time.  We've all heard that and we may even say it a lot during a match (I certainly do).  But, honestly, you need to forget about the outcome of the match and focus on what's happening on the court right now.  Even if the whole team is watching from the sidelines.  Even if winning this match makes you club champ.  Even if you've been wanting to kick this girl's butt since high school.  So get your emotions out of the match.  Stop projecting out to some future event that isn't happening yet - like how great it would be to win this match or how awful it would be to lose.  Forget about the outcome.  Just think about how to play the ball that's right in front of you at this very moment.

3.  Look good.  That's right - take a few deep breaths to calm yourself and then . . . just look good.  Put a smile on your face and look happy, energetic, alert, and confident.  Just acting positive and upbeat will make you feel much better and will bring you back from the brink of a mental breakdown.  And it will keep from giving any encouragement to your opponent.  Acting as if you're playing a great match and have no intention of giving up can often deflate the opponent who thought she had already destroyed you.  It may even put enough doubt in her mind as to what's going on to send her over the edge.

I'm throwing in a bonus Step 4 if you're playing doubles:

4. Talk to your partner. Let her know what's going on in your head. If you have even a half decent partner, she will let you know that its not the end of the world right now and she hasn't thrown in the towel yet either. Communicating with your partner may be all you need to get some positive vibes going on the court.





© Kim Selzman 2010 All Rights Reserved

Tennis Makes Your Smarter!

You know that tennis is great exercise.  That's part of the reason you're playing, right?  But did you know that tennis is good for your brain too?  Tennis makes you smarter!

In general, exercise is great for your brain.  Experts have found that:  "When you exercise, muscles begin to use oxygen at a higher rate, and the heart pumps more oxygenated blood through the carotid artery to the brain. In fact, the brain uses about 25 percent of the oxygen that you take in. Because exercise creates endorphins, people who exercise regularly have more energy, feel alert and have an increased sense of well-being and better memory retention."  (You can read this and way more details in this article:  Mind-Body Exercise Connection.)

But tennis is not just plain, old exercise.  It's a mental game too.  In his post 34 Benefits of Tennis, Dr. Jack Groppel, Ph.D. and USPTA Master Professional, notes that, "Psychologically, the simple fact that you are practicing (or competing) one-on-one (or two-against-two in doubles) means that there is a human interaction necessary to perform. Studies have shown that one learns to manage adversity, improves problem-solving skills and learns how to manage mistakes and crises. Some studies have even shown brain growth through the problem-solving activities of tennis."

So now you have another great reason to justify all that time on the court - you're just trying to get smarter!


© Kim Selzman 2010 All Rights Reserved

Just A Lucky Shot - Part 2

How ironic that the day after I posted the "Just A Lucky Shot?" piece, I came up against the two "luckiest" ladies I've played in a long, long time.

From the time we started warming up, I kept telling my partner how dang sloppy they were. Both of them had terrible form and seemed completely unfocused. They were laughing and chatting throughout the warm-up and right into the match.

Now, I'm not saying I assumed we would win. I never assume I will win. I have had my butt kicked by plenty of ladies who were a lot older than me, a lot heavier than me and wore a lot more braces and devices than I will ever even figure out how to use. But I did believe we would PROBABLY win if we just worked hard and played aggressively.

And then the lucky shots started. I would hit a "winner" and the tall one would somehow stretch and reach it and get it back. I would slam an overhead and the chatty one would run back and just barely catch the ball on the bounce. My partner would hit hard, deep returns, and somehow, some way, our opponents kept getting them back.

At first, I told my partner, "Don't worry. That was just a lucky shot." But by about lucky shot number 12, I had to finally admit that not only were these ladies getting a whole bunch of lucky shots, I was getting beaten by these lucky shots!

Our opponents never stopped giggling. Their form never improved. But they kept hitting those weird, "I can't believe she got to that" shots, and in the end, they beat us. Not by a lot. But they beat us just the same.

So the first lesson I learned is actually the lesson I was trying to teach in my "Just A Lucky Shot?" post - don't be embarrassed when you win points with those seemingly lucky shots. You're doing something right and you can even win a match with those.

And the second lesson? Watch out for those sloppy, laughing, unfocused players who just keep hitting lucky shots!











© Kim Selzman 2010
All Rights Reserved

Just A Lucky Shot?

Do you hit winners with the frame of your racquet?  Do you serve aces that land nowhere near where you were aiming?   Do you hit shots that clip the net and somehow end up on the other side of the net, winning you the point?

Don't be embarrassed when this happens!  These may seem like "lucky shots" to you, and to your opponents, but the reality is - those shots only happen because about 85% of what you're doing is right.  Your racquet is pretty darn close to being properly positioned.  Your serve is almost going to the right spot.  Your shot is getting closer and closer to landing exactly where you planned for it to go.  Sure, we all hit "lucky shots."  But the more you practice, the more you try, the more lucky shots you'll hit. 

So don't be humiliated to win the point with these kind of shots.  Be proud!  Take that point and know that you're getting closer to playing exactly as well as you want to play!







© Kim Selzman 2010
All Rights Reserved

Don't Throw In The Towel!

Have you been in this position lately? You lost the first set 1-6. You're now down 1-5 in the second set and only two points away from the whole thing being over. AND it just started to drizzle and you want this match to end already. The court is getting a little wet and slippy but you don't want to make up those last two points at a later date, so you turn to your partner and say, "Let's just get this over with. The court is just barely damp and I don't want to forfeit these last two points."

So you sit back, mentally, relax and play out the end of the set. And, what do you know? You somehow win that game. And the next. And a few more. And it stops drizzling and the court dries up and suddenly, without realizing it, you're in a 6-6 set about to go into a tiebreaker! What just happened?

OK, I'll admit it. This just happened to me recently. And I've been thinking about how we went from being unable to beat an unbeatable team to being in a tiebreaker. I think a couple of things happened:

1. We didn't give up. We could have forfeited those last two points just to get off the court. We could have tanked on those points to avoid the forfeit but to get to the loss and get off the court. But we didn't. We kept playing.

2. We relaxed. Honestly, we had nothing to lose at that point. Once we were going to keep playing, we did just that.

3. I think our opponents had decided they had already won the match. I mean, they were only two points away. I think they hung back and weren't trying quite as hard to beat us as they had been.

So what was the conclusion? Well, we lost the tiebreaker 8-10 and thus lost the match. But it was a great way to lose and it gave me a lot to think about. The team that seemed unbeatable really wasn't. And giving up should just never, ever be an option.

Now this happened to me and I thought it was weird and very typical of something that only happens to me in my tennis. But, just a few days later, Serena Williams came back from being down a set and at 0-4 in the second set to beat Victoria Azarenka in the quarter-finals of the Australian Open. So it happens to the pros too! Or maybe it just happens to me and Serena.

Lesson:  Relax and never throw in the towel.




© Kim Selzman 2010
All Rights Reserved

Tennis Thoughts: Buddha on Tennis

“Each morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most.” ~ Buddha

Is it me or does it seem like you're either winning everything or losing constantly? I seem to be in the middle of a tennis slump right now and its hard to know when that will end. I'm tired of losing.

But I try to remember, with each match, what the Buddha said: "Each morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most." I'm pretty sure this applies to tennis just as much as it applies to life.

So, I'm not letting this slump get me down. I'm approaching every match with a good attitude and feeling like today's the day I win. I actually played some pretty great tennis last Friday although it was just for fun. But who knows? Maybe I've turned the corner. What I do in my next match is what matters most.





© Kim Selzman 2010
All Rights Reserved

Playing Better Players

A few times I've mentioned that one of my teams has moved up to the Champ level. So, as amazing as it may seem to anyone who knows me and knows my tennis game, I am on a Champ team! Even I find it hard to believe. Having just finished my first season at the Champ level, I can tell you, I played PLENTY of good ladies. Players who were much better than me.

So how do you approach the match where you know you're playing a better player? How do you play when you know you may get beat?

1. Be positive. Don't get down because you feel like you're about to take a humiliating beating. Although you probably always want to win, you know you can't always win. And when you're playing a markedly better player, you're really under no pressure to win. So remain upbeat about the situation and have a good time.
2. Expect to be challenged.  Expect that your usual "tricks" aren't going to work with good players.  Expect that you will have to play long, hard tennis and you may have to come up with some new and different strategies.  If you're playing doubles, be SURE you're talking to your partner and coming up with a plan for every game if not for every point.  
3. Play your "A" game. Don't dumb down your tennis. A lot of times when everything's going wrong, your tendency may be to pull back and just get the ball over the net. Better players are going to kill you if that's you're strategy. So remain aggressive and push through the feeling that you need to take it down a notch.
4. Learn as much as you can from the experience. Take advantage of the opportunity to see what players at a higher level do that sets them apart and then see how you can use those lessons to improve your own game. For example, I've found, again and again, that the difference between the A level players I used to play and the Champ players I'm now playing is that those Champ ladies hit the ball hard and everything comes back. I did not realize how often I relaxed and eased back after hitting a winner until those winners kept being returned (in other words, they weren't winners after all!). Lesson learned - do not relax until the point is completely over!

© Kim Selzman 2009
All Rights Reserved

"Your Calls Are So Bad - You Need Glasses!"

Sometimes people ask me, "Aren't you afraid you'll run out of things to say about tennis?" And then I play a match where one of my opponents says, "Your calls are so bad that you need glasses!" and I think I'm never going to run out of things to say about tennis.

Yesterday I played on my Champ level team (me at Champ level is a whole other story) with Susan who could not be sweeter, nicer and funner to play with. Somewhere in about the third game of the first set, I swear it was that early, after Susan had called one of our opponent's shots out for maybe the third time, our opponent lost it. I mean completely LOST it. Her exact words were, "That's at least the seventh bad call you've made! Seriously! Your calls are so bad - you need glasses!" Susan responded, the opponent responded, this went on for just a little while. And then we went back to playing.

To say the match suddenly got unfriendly would be putting it mildly. And the trash talk did not end there. On one of the changeovers, our opponent's partner somehow found the opportunity to tell Susan, "Well, I'm not going to make bad calls just because someone else is making bad calls. I'm totally supportive of my partner."

Geez Louise!

The good news for me and MY partner is this ridiculous exchange really fired us up. Susan was NOT going to lose this match. And she wasn't going to let me lose it either. We ultimately won in a third-set super tiebreaker so, in my opinion, it could have gone either way. But my partner not only did NOT lose her cool, she kept me going. She kept me calm and on track.

And we won! Without telling anyone they needed glasses! What a fun match!

AND, by the way, the trash talker HIT me in the leg on an overhead AND she apologized profusely. Her mistake.





© Kim Selzman 2009
All Rights Reserved

Arthur Ashe On Tennis

After the U.S. Open, I got really interested in Arthur Ashe. If you watched even 5 minutes of the Open, you probably heard his name repeatedly since the main stadium for the U.S. Open is (you guessed it) Arthur Ashe Stadium. Which also happens to be the site for Arthur Ashe Kid's Day which kicks off the U.S. Open each year.

I picked up his book, Arthur Ashe on Tennis: Strokes, Strategy, Traditions, Players, Psychology, and Wisdom. You probably know that Arthur Ashe died in 1993 at the age of 49 from AIDS-related complications. He won 3 Grand Slam titles in his tennis career - the 1968 U.S. Open, the 1970 Australian Open, and Wimbledon in 1975.

His book was published in 1995, after his death. So Ashe was not around to see all of the changes we see on the pro circuit today - powerful racquets, indestructible strings, open-stance strokes, exaggerated grips. But you and I aren't playing on the pro circuit (at least I don't think we are), so a lot of his points are still valid for club players like us, out to have fun and play some competitive tennis. He gives lots and lots of bullet-point tips on strokes and strategy. Here, for example, is a right-to-the-point list of tips that Ashe gives to immediately improve your game (pp. 50-51):

Keys to Better Play - Here are eight suggestions on how you can improve your game almost immediately:

1. Play with a decisive attitude. Make up your mind where you want to hit the ball and hit it there, without worrying about your opponent. It is critical to do that on passing shots.
2. Mix up your shots. Be unpredictable to keep your opponent off balance.
3. Have a plan on break point. It can be as simple as trying to get the ball in play. Against a net-rusher, hit the ball cross-court over the lower part of the net, giving you a better angle for putting the ball at his feet. Against a baseliner, return deep, preferably to his weaker ground stroke so he cannot hurt you with his big shot. If you return short, he may hit a winner.
4. Lob when you're in trouble. It is almost always a safer option that a passing shot when you are pulled out of court.
5. Hit approach shots down the line. . . .
6. Cover the open angles at the net. That means moving in the direction of your preceding shot. . . .
7. Get moving after you hit the ball. You don't have time to stand there admiring your shot.
8. Practice with a purpose. Use a lot of balls, divide your practice time into segments during which you practice only one things, and finish your session [by playing out points].

I probably need someone standing on the side of the court during my matches shouting, "Number 7! Number 7!"

But more than these insights, what I really like about Ashe's book is the chapters on tennis traditions and wisdom. He spends one whole page talking about the wearing of tennis whites and the somewhat controversial move to colored apparel. He even points out (p. 63) that "In 1969, I was among a group that broke the color-clothing barrier in the U.S. Open . . . by wearing pastel-colored shirts." Gasp!

Ashe has several great recommendations for playing doubles, which I like as many books, magazine articles and websites fail to recognize that that's what a whole lot of us are playing. I'll go into a few of those in future posts as they are pretty insightful and could definitely improve my doubles game (and maybe your's too).






© Kim Selzman 2009
All Rights Reserved

Effort Is A Skill

I just read a really great post on the Essential Tennis blog - Effort Is A Skill. It talks about the difference between the lackadaisical out-there-for-some-fun player and the player who tries to run down every single ball and give it everything they've got. Read this post (by clicking on the post title above) and learn that, whatever your athletic skill level, here's another way to get an advantage over your opponent.









Photo from essentialtennis.com
© Kim Selzman 2009
All Rights Reserved

Tennis Thoughts: Paramhansa Yogananda on Tennis

"Learn to be calm and you will always be happy." - Paramhansa Yogananda

It's not just a way of life. It's a way to play tennis!

For example, here's the match I played last Friday:

Lost the first set, 2-6. Went to the bathroom between sets. Won the second set, 6-3. Immediately started super tiebreaker in lieu of 3rd set as required by this league. Lost tiebreaker 2-10. Lesson: I should have taken another bathroom break after the second set.

Why? Because then I would have calmed down and focused on what I needed to do in that tiebreaker. I really felt rushed and hurried in the tiebreaker, like I couldn't quite get control of what I was doing or what was happening on the court.

Playing calmly, with focus, is probably the most important thing I can do and I'm pretty sure it's the most important thing any tennis player can do in a match. I have a few techniques I use to calm myself (breathe, talk to my partner between each point, tie my shoes, take a bathroom break!!!). I just need to consciously apply those techniques constantly during my matches.

So today, when I play tennis, which I am off to do in about 15 minutes, I will work on playing calmly and with focus. And I'll see if that doesn't give me better results.





© Kim Selzman 2009
All Rights Reserved

US Open Finally Ends - Thank God!

Its been a day now since the conclusion of the U.S. Open and, frankly, I'm exhausted. Every day for the last few days has been such drama!

What am I thinking about after the end of this Slam?

1. The Serena Williams implosion during her semi-final match against Kim Clijsters was just ugly. Even though she's been fined, has made the requisite apologies (heartfelt or not) and tried to move on, its still front page news (at least in my newspaper). I'm tired of this story. Can't we hear about incredible mom Kim Clijsters and her amazing return to tennis?

2. But here's the big lesson I took away from that situation: don't lose control. I think Serena was going down in that match no matter what and she knew it. But she guaranteed that with her behavior. And not just because her actions resulted in a penalty point that turned out to be match point. She had obviously worked herself up to quite a state before the foot fault was called and I don't think she was going to finish out in anything even nearly approaching a calm and cool state of mind.

3. On the other hand, here's a story we STILL never hear: that Serena made it so deep into the singles draw and still managed to win women's doubles with her sister, Venus. I just find that amazing but none of the commentators seem to talk about it.

4. Juan Martin Del Potro defeats Roger Federer - and I'm actually excited about this! My husband is not. He wants to see records broken, i.e., Federer winning another Slam. I, on the other hand, want to be surprised. I don't want to keep seeing Federer play Nadal.

5. How great was Melanie Oudin? She was a true break-out star at the U.S. Open and I'm sad the season is pretty much over just because I'd love to see what happens with her next. We'll just have to wait until the Australian Open.

6. Leander Paes is a pretty incredible doubles player. This is probably old news to a lot of people but, because the Tennis Channel, ESPN, the networks, etc. choose to show so little doubles, I'm only now really noticing him. He won in men's doubles and lost in the finals of mixed doubles. Hopefully, we'll see more doubles play in the future.

7. Finally, I'm a little tired of hearing Bud Collins tell me how Rene Lacoste made such a huge contribution to tennis when he invented the polo shirt.






© Kim Selzman 2009
All Rights Reserved

"But I LOVE My Opponents!"

Don't you hate playing your friends? Sure, you want to have fun. But what you really want to do is play well.


Maybe, if your friends are pretty good players, you want to show them you're not the weak link out on the court. (Read this post to figure out who IS the weak link: Pick On The Weak Link.) And what's the worst thing that can happen in this situation, the thing that inevitably happens? You completely tank. You play so poorly that you humiliate yourself. How can you ever face your friends again?

If this psychological drama doesn't sound familiar to you, congratulations. You're obviously a well-adjusted individual who does not let their athletic abilities (or inabilities) determine their self-worth. (Or possibly you're playing way too far down.)

But, if you've ever had even just a twinge of discomfort with playing your friends, here are a few things to think about that will get you through those matches with your friendship, and dignity, intact:

1. Realize that no one is thinking about you. You may think they are. But they're not. They're most likely thinking about themselves and how they are playing. In fact, your friends are probably just as worried as you about being perceived as the weakest link!

2. Forget about impressing anyone. It just never works. To play your best, you have to play relaxed. Trying to hit a really hard serve usually just results in hitting a really bad serve. And if you're in the situation where you need to impress someone because you're "trying out" for a team, its best to follow your mother's advice and just be yourself. Again, play relaxed and you'll see much better results.

3. Don't apologize for the quality of your play. I mean it. Absolutely do NOT apologize when you feel you are playing poorly. First, it doesn't help. Second, if your partner is upset because she thinks you're the reason for how badly things are going, apologizing will only piss her off more. Third, you have NOTHING to apologize for when you're playing tennis. It's a game for God's sake and it's supposed to be FUN!

4. And, remember - you only get better by playing better people. This is the one great truism about tennis. So don't feel badly if it turns out that, for this match at least, you ARE the weakest link. Play as well as YOU can and know that being beat by your friends can only make you a better player.




© Kim Selzman 2009
All Rights Reserved

"I HATE My Tennis Partner!"

First off, I don't HATE any of my partners. There are many, many of them and they are all lovely people with whom I enjoy playing tennis. I wouldn't play if I wasn't having fun, right?

And you probably don't hate your tennis partner either. But, sometimes, on occasion, maybe every once in awhile, you end up with a partner you're not completely compatible with. I call this the "mismatched partner."

Maybe your mismatched partner is someone new you've never played with before. Or never even met before! Maybe your mismatched partner is someone you've been invited to play with for fun. Or maybe your mismatched partner is someone you were assigned to play with by your team captain for a league match. However it happens, we’re all familiar with how difficult it can be to have to play with one of these mismatched partners.

Here are a few tips to make sure you not only get along with your mismatched partner, but that you enjoy playing and maybe win your match!

1. Control your emotions. The worst thing you can do when you're unhappy with your partner is let her know it. It won't help her play any better and it probably won't make you feel any better. So get a grip on yourself and decide that, between the two of you, YOU are going to be the strong and positive leader.
2. Be positive. It doesn't help anyone if you're negative. It makes you feel bad and it makes your partner feel even worse. If you have some helpful criticism, give it in an upbeat way. For example, if your partner won't come up to the net, telling her "I think we can really hurt them if we're both up at the net" is a lot more productive than "Why can't you just get up to the net??!!"
3. Help your partner focus on tennis. Its hard to play with someone who isn't concentrating on your match. Instead of letting them ramble on about the chances of their son getting into a really good college, help them concentrate on your match by talking about what's happening on the court. Just letting them know what you're thinking about and planning, i.e., "I'm trying to serve up the middle to set you up for the poach", may be enough to get them focused on tennis.
4. Communicate. Talking throughout the match can only help. Let your partner know what you're thinking. And if you're worried that this will bother your partner (maybe they'll think you're being hypercritical or don't know what you're talking about or are just talking too much) do what I do and claim you're mostly talking to yourself. Here's my standard disclaimer: "Don't let all of my talking get to you. I'm mostly talking to myself anyway."
5. Don't throw in the towel. Giving up is the best way to lose your match. And once you've let your partner know you've given up, she will probably give up too. So don't quit because you never know what might happen. The match you think you may lose can turn out to be the incredible comeback story you're telling your tennis pals about later!
6. Work on your own game. When all else fails, when you've finally decided the match is unwinnable because you just can't play well with this person, think about playing well for yourself. Play your game and find something you can work on - be more aggressive, hit your spin second serve, poach more, come in more, lob more. Use the match as an opportunity to improve your own game so you can walk away feeling good about tennis.

The mismatched partner - you have a hard time playing with them, but you can't back out. And you shouldn't! Because, I think this is a common tennis saying - tennis with a mismatched partner is always better than no tennis at all.

If you want to make sure YOU'RE not the mismatched partner, click on the following post and get my tips on How To Be A Great Tennis Partner!





© Kim Selzman 2009
All Rights Reserved

Just One Thing

Sometimes, doing everything correctly in tennis can be overwhelming. You just can't think of every possible thing you are supposed to be doing AND actually do it, all at the same time.

Many of us have a tendency to overthink things when playing. In fact, I think I might be guilty of this (how else could this blog survive)? Here is a typical example of me analyzing my serve:

Let's say I want to hit a good serve during a match. What do I need to do to hit a good serve?

1. Have a proper toss
2. Use the right grip on my racquet
3. Go through the appropriate arm motion with my racquet
4. Hit the ball with the correct spin
5. Hit the ball to the right spot
6. Follow-through

That's 6 things I need to do just to hit a good serve. And as I look at that list, I can think of a few more things that could easily be on there (what about wrist snap? keeping my head up?). Is there any chance that I will think of all of those things each and every time I serve in a match? Probably not.

So instead of trying to think of all of those things on each serve, and driving myself insane at the same time, I try to think of just one thing. While it might be a different "one thing" depending on how the match is going or what I feel like that day, usually I try to concentrate on my toss for each serve. I pick my toss because I know that's the beginning of the entire serve and if I don't get that right, nothing good will follow. And, thinking about my toss ultimately coaxes me into thinking about all of the other aspects of my serve.

Then I have faith that, at some point, even my completely undeveloped and unreliable reflexes are going to kick in and do the right thing enough times so that I play as if I look like I've at least heard of the game of tennis and hit a few serves.

So instead of overthinking your next match and trying to remember all of the things you are supposed to do, try having just one thing that you will focus on and try to accomplish. Maybe its your toss. Maybe its coming in to the net more often. Maybe its working on your shot placement. Just pick one thing to work on so that even if the match doesn't go your way that day, you can feel like you have worked hard and accomplished something.

By the way, just to let you know I am no lightweight in the "overthinking it" department, here are all the things I have to do for a good toss:

1. Hold the ball in my fingertips
2. Lower my tossing arm the right amount
3. Lift my tossing arm correctly
4. Keep my tossing arm relatively straight throughout this motion
5. Don't throw the ball up but release it correctly so it is not spinning (much) on the toss
6. Toss the ball to the appropriate height
7. Keep my tossing arm up as long as possible
8. Keep my chin up as long as possible
9. Place the toss correctly - out in front, overhead, more to the right, more to the left
10. Allow the ball to drop to the correct spot before hitting it

So now I have 10 THINGS to think about and do to get a good toss! AAAGGGHHH!




© Kim Selzman 2009
All Rights Reserved

"The Best Tennis of Your Life"

You see it all the time: Players choke. They don’t focus. They throw in the towel. They fail to close out the game, set and match. Tennis is such a mental game!

But how much time do you put into strengthening the mental aspect of your tennis game? Probably not much. Or, if you’re like me, it’s more like none at all.

Well, that is about to change for me because I just finished reading The Best Tennis of Your Life: 50 Mental Strategies for Fearless Performance by Jeff Greenwald. Here are 50 ways to handle almost any psychological problem you come up against on the court. Problems with your partner? Turn to Chapter 29 – “Develop Positive Chemistry With Your Doubles Partner.” Intimidated by better players? Read through Chapter 9 – “Focus on Your Game, Not Your Opponent’s Ranking.” Pissed off at cheaters? Look over Chapter 33 – “Keep Your Cool When the Bad Line Call Happens.”

Each chapter is short and sweet, just a page or two, and gives you concrete ways to deal with your mental problems on the court. For example, in Chapter 19, “Establish Your Presence Before Serving,” Greenwald talks about the problems we all have as we step up to the baseline and prepare to serve: “Whether it’s impatience to get the next point started, frustration with the serve in general, anxiety about double-faulting, or just plain old habit, the actions in which players engage in the time prior to serving is perhaps the most widely abused time in the game.” Greenwald, p. 54. As he goes on to point out, most of us have no pre-serve routine and simply hope to get that serve over with. Greenwald then provides a simple routine to improve your serve:

First, take a deep breath as you walk to the line to establish your presence. This is brief but deliberate. Second, create a quick visual image in your mind of the ball traveling toward your target. Make sure you are decisive with your placement of the serve. No second-guessing. This is critical. Third, check the tension in your shoulders and arm. Keep a loose arm! This routine is followed by you bouncing the ball a set number of times (how many is up to you) and then serving. Keep this routine consistent and practice it regularly so it’s automatic.

Greenwald, p. 55. How easy is that? Breathing, visualization and getting loose – all the elements that will undoubtedly help you get off a good serve.

The Best Tennis of Your Life is a book that you can easily keep in your tennis bag and turn to as you’re waiting to go on court for a quick boost of confidence and insight. That’s where I’ll be keeping my copy.




© Kim Selzman 2009
All Rights Reserved